Just go Lick a Battery

Maybe I should. Now that is an interesting concept. Let me extrapolate on that. No, licking a battery is not a new teenage trend for a cheap high.  It's what a patient on Bi-Polar meds may resort to doing with the sky high rising cost of Lithium.

I'm joking of course about licking a battery, but the rising cost of Lithium is no laughing matter.  The issue gets even more interesting when I found out WHY in recent months Lithium Carbonate, one of the most commonly prescribed medication for Bi-Polar has tripled in price. It is fair to say that Lithium prices fluctuate, but I have been taking it for 20+ years and have never seen it this high.

So a little background information might be helpful. Lithium is naturally present in the brain and throughout the body as a trace element.  Lithium plays a critical role in maintaining a healthy brain. After being prescribed other drugs for Bi-Polar, my doctor and I settled on Lithium to work the best for me.  It was a comfort to know it's a naturally occurring element in my body. I recently found out that the Harvard Medical School has released an on-going study that links Lithium to diminish brain aging and Alzheimer's disease. Amazing and inspiring research! 

I never thought of Lithium as gold, but it is a mineral extracted from ore and manufactured with processes similar  to that of many "precious minerals".  To achieve Lithium Carbonate medication, however, there are many complicated steps to achieve pharmaceutical grade purity.

The main driving force behind the rising cost is the demand for lithium ion batteries for use in electric vehicles. And here I thought the numbers of patients diagnosed with Bi-Polar had tripled (along with the price)  Obviously, the processes utilized for the production of  lithium batteries and lithium medication are  different, yet the origination of the mineral is the same. I find it hard to believe that many sources claim that the COVID-19 pandemic still has a lasting effect on supply chains and limiting mining capacity. I guess the pandemic affected us in more ways than we realize.  Then because of fluctuations in mining, production is very volatile, thereby making prices go up and down. I'm hoping that they eventually will go down. Now many may be thinking "Why don't you just pay for prescription drug coverage under Medicare?" I did look into that, and it's just not worth it for one medication.  My premiums would be higher than justifying the purchase of the medication.. Besides this is a medication I have been on and it USED to cost me next to nothing...about $13 for a 3 month supply. I guess I shouldn't complain, some people have very costly medications. However, the reason lithium prices have increased is what really blows me away.

I spoke with my Husband about this odd and unlikely connection between Lithium prices and electric car battery demand. In his most ominous voice he declared: "It's all Connected." This brought me a chuckle because we had just finished a dramatic series on Netflix: Manifest, where the phrase: It's all connected" was repeated over and over. It's a story of on airplane crash and the passengers, presumed dead who have come back years later. Problems of the past are solved with problems in the future. Yes, "it's all connected".  Yes, there is a connection between the cost of  my medication and the demand for electric vehicle batteries. So many things in our world truly are connected, but I personally think this is an odd one.  I guess I'm destined to pay the higher prices until the come back down, and the are precited to decline, or at least fluctuate.  I promise not to just lick a battery for my Lithium needs. 

I will take my meds, as prescribed, morning and night, but the cost is a "hard pill to swallow". Perhaps the price will go down, it could happen. Volatile market, remember?

                    Julie Etta Smith

Hope

 Hope....Now there is a powerful word that I seem to be using both in conversations and my unspoken thoughts.  Hopefully Spring will be coming soon. Hopefully the War in Iran can be resolved soon.  Hopefully the economy will improve.  Hopefully the environment will be protected.  Hopefully my family (including myself) will stay happy and healthy. The list goes on and on. I was thinking I want to be optimistic, and in the same token shield myself from such mental distress as to not be able to function with day to day living.  I want to be hopeful and proactive with making the world a better place.  Yet sometimes I think to myself is it blind optimism to approach the troubles of our lives this way?  Is it looking through the world through Rose Colored glasses as a manner of survival?  I am still am not sure how to answer that, but I looked to the wisdom of a man who brought much hope to many people: Barack Obama.  I really miss his leadership and I am stressed beyond belief about what is happening with our current administration.  I know this country has been through many tough times, but I'm sure he had much to say about the concept of HOPE and was even included in the title of his book: The Audacity of Hope: Thoughts on Reclaiming the American Dream.  (2006) Granted it was two years before his Presidency, but he had hope and optimistic visions for us all. One of his quotes about hope really inspires me to keep on hoping:

So the tricky part for me is how does one define "hope"? For me it is allowing me to keep my Rose Colored glasses of optimism on long enough to allow me to see the magic of possibilities there.  Seeing the wonder of our world that exists, but having the strength and determination to take the glasses off to see the harsh realities of the world.  I believe that only when we have seen the true realities of what can exist and experience,  can we hope to strive for a better world.  Having the opportunity to experience the good, allows us to hope for and walk the pathway to achieving better lives.

Perhaps this seems too philosophical for many of the concrete problems that we deal with, but it's a matter of survival for many of us.  I can't get too entrenched in serious world problems without taking into consideration how it affects my day to day living and my capacity for carrying out my tasks.  I'm not looking for a cop-out, I'm just looking for survival.  I have to hang on to my Rose Colored Glasses for survival without going stir-crazy. I occasionally take a peek over the rims for a glance at reality. As I finish up this blog post, it occurs to me that it is the first "official" day of Spring and the weather forecasters are predicting the 60's. Now that is encouraging and Hopeful.  Stay Hopeful my Friends.

                                                                                                                Julie Etta Smith

Seeking Similarities

 In the current political climate, there seems to be so much divisiveness and strife.  The polar opposite opinions seem to pull us even further apart than "normally"...whatever normal is.  I frequently seek solace in my faith. In doing so, I am not trying to solve todays contemporary problems but to find the strength to continue to fight the good fight and to also find clarity and solutions for the problems at hand.  I also hope beyond hope that some of our community and world leaders can also find clarity and solutions. 

However, this is not a blog post about contemporary politics, rather it is about contemporary faith. It is amazing when you think how specifically different denominations have changed throughout history.  So many of the changes started with Martin Luther posting the 95 Theses to the door of the church, sparking the Protestant Reformation. In many ways that was just the start of monumental changes that continue today.

Any church that I have ever attended, the fellowship was comprised of many different backgrounds/ denominations.  It is rare to find an individual who was born, raised and died within the exact same denomination.  Many seem to have different spiritual paths. If you talk to your fellow church goers, in any church, I bet you will find a diversity of backgrounds. For example, there is probably a large sampling of Lutheran, Presbyterian, Methodist and also Catholic.  A little research revealed to me that there are 46 different types of Christian denominations! That number can vary depending exactly how you classify the groupings. With so many diverse denominations that still consider themselves “Christian”, there are characteristics that make each church unique, but also values that bring us together: the ties that bind.  Denominations within the Christian church are put in different categories based on different characteristics including theology and worship practices. Even though there are distinct differences in the worship, I truly believe that our similarities are more numerous bringing us together in weaving the fabric of our spiritual lives.

I myself was raised in a Unitarian Universalist church and I later gravitated to a Methodist church.  My Grandmother was a devout Methodist and I remember how comforted and enriched she felt by her Methodist faith.  I married my husband in the Methodist church and attended a Methodist church for years. We later attended a Presbyterian church, after moving we went to a Congregational church…then currently attend a Covenant church. Frankly I had never heard of a Covenant church before.  Yet, that’s the beauty of so many Christian denominations you can feel right at home when a church is following the teachings of Christ and honoring the wisdom that can be learned from the Holy Bible.

Another recent journey made me think of the ties that bind us as Christians, no matter what our denomination. While visiting my son is Alaska, we went to visit The Shrine of St.Therese near Juneau. It is a beautiful, serene setting paying homage to Therese de Lisieux, chosen as the patron saint of Alaska.  The choosing of saints is a practice by the Catholic Church and this was a place that was a Catholic pilgrimage.  Nevertheless, the beauty and serenity of the place made me feel very welcome, even as a non-Catholic. I felt open to being spiritually uplifted. There is a chapel built with beach stone, a walkway that goes through the woods and close to the ocean.  We even saw several whale spouts out on the water.

 Also on the property is a large prayer labyrinth. My son and his partner walked the labyrinth, in the warm September sun, and got quite the workout.  I spoke with my son about walking the labyrinth; he felt it was a long and winding journey, perhaps an analogy for life itself. Sometimes it would be tempting to quit, but you must see it through to the end. Yet, in following the path it also provided a mental “cleansing” of sorts.  Just as our walkway through life, it is a different journey for everyone.

Prayer Labyrinth at the Shrine of St. Therese

I’m sure there were differing spiritual backgrounds for everyone visiting that shrine, but there was a feeling of serenity and tranquility. There seemed to be a shared goal of peace and unity that transcended any denominational differences. So our spiritual roots may be diverse, but I think it is beneficial to uplift the similarities and not dwell on the differences.  As I mentioned before the "Ties that Bind" is a wonderful concept in how our similarities bring us together. The expression “the Ties that Bind” originates from a beautiful hymn:  Blessed be the Tie that Binds .(written in 1792)  It is an old hymn, but has the enduring quality of a hymn with a wonderful message. The message it sends is a powerful one: 

Blessed be the tie that binds, Our hearts in Christian love; 

The fellowship of kindred minds, is like that to that above.

Before our Father's throne, We pour our ardent prayers:

Our fears, our hopes, our aims are one.

Our comforts and our cares.

We share each other's woes, Our mutual burdens bear;

And often for each other flows the sympathizing tear.

There are differences of course in matters of our spirituality, but if we seek out the similarities, they can bind us together for strength, clarity and love.

    Julie E. Smith

"What was the name again?.....Abby...Someone...Abby Normal."

Laughter truly is the best medicine & Mel Brooks knows how to provide that medicine.  I have had 2 surgeries in the past 3 months, so having good "medicine" is on my mind.  Of course the pharmaceutical route is important for healing, but of course laughter and a positive mental outlook definitely helps the healing process. Both recent surgeries brought to me some ideas for healing with laughter and relaxation.

I admit it, the Mel Brooks humor really appeals to me, especially in the classic Young Frankenstein. If you've never seen this comedy classic, this particular scene Gene Wilder (Young Frankenstein) asks his assistant where he got the brain from to put into the man they are attempting to bring back to life. Igor (Marty Feldman) says "Abby someone...Abby Normal."    What follows is Gene Wilder's dialogue chastising Igor for putting an abnormal brain in his creation.  This clip from the Young Frankenstein movie always makes me laugh, it's a classic.

The reason this little movie clip came to my mind, is the fact that my recent mammogram showed an "abnormal" test result requiring further testing and a biopsy.  Luckily the biopsy turned out benign.  I had out-patient surgery, a lumpectomy, and I'm going to be fine. Yet, it was pretty nerve wracking until I knew what was happening.  Seeing the "Abnormal" show up when checking my test results on line caused some worry.  Sometimes I think I should wait for a call from the doctor's office instead of trying to figure out what "abnormal" means. In any case, I am glad that by brain has a tendency to look for the humor in situations, to diffuse the worry and/ or stress. Hence the Abby Normal joke. It's an oldie but a goodie.

Looking for humor is nothing new for me, I started as a young girl.  My Grandmother subscribed to Reader's Digest.  when visiting with her, I always turned to the humor sections first; especially Laughter : the Best Medicine. So many of the little stories could always make me laugh. Maybe it is a bit "old-fashioned" but I subscribe to Reader's Digest, mostly for the humorous anecdotes. 

My most recent surgery, a Total Knee Replacement, brought to mind a therapy that is good medicine, but not necessarily laughter: it is the importance of relaxation.   When I was in the hospital, waiting for surgery and also in recovery, I really enjoyed the soothing music and tranquil nature scenes played in each room.  I am sure most people have seen these types of channels on programming meant to relax and sooth the patient.  Well, studies show that it really does help people relax, lower blood pressure and provide an atmosphere of caring.  A good state of mental health can also provide good results on the physical aspects of healing.  It helped me.  In the bottom corner of each video is the acronym C.A.R..E.  Anytime I see an acronym....well I just gotta know what it stands for.  So I looked it up and it means: Continuous Ambient Relaxation Environment.  Perfect. I just love it.  It also is connected to a web site and mobile app.  From their site: "The premier relaxation programming for healthcare settings, The C.A.R.E. Channel is produced to comfort patients, families, and staff over the full 24-hour cycle. This highly effective therapeutic tool significantly contributes to improved satisfaction and patient outcomes, and helps you create a healing environment for patients, families, and staff.

It was awesome when I was there, and was much better than listening to the news of the day and/ or hearing health monitoring machine alarms going off.  So after getting home, I discovered that on their site, they even offer  subscriptions to their relaxing videos and music via a desk top site or a mobile app.  I considered it, but like many apps, it comes with a free "trial" period followed by a monthly subscription period.  I decided for my purposes, it just wasn't worth it.  Besides, I did discover that if I need a "fix" of comforting C.A.R.E. videos that can be found on YouTube. Just type in "care channel" and you can watch a free demo video.  It's more addictive than Oxycodone.  When my husband and I were waiting for my knee surgery, it was kind of unique to see on the video places that looked amazingly familiar that we recognized from our travels.  Pretty sure that included scenery from Glacier National Park and the Apostle Islands.  Since there were several that looked so much like the cliff formations of the Apostle Islands in northern Wisconsin, I can't help but wonder if the C.A.R.E.  channel features "localized" programming...Perhaps.  Either way, it has helped my recovery.

So during my recovery, I have also made a few little jokes with myself that are not really suitable for print.  Nevertheless,  it does feel good to laugh.  It's good medicine.  

Julie Etta Smith

The Link between Art & Madness

Vincent van Gogh,1889

Creative people have frequently been considered "different" from the norm of the general population. In more specific terms, the artistic temperment frequently manifests itself with manic-depressive  symptoms.  Modern psychiatry has taught us that when we look at the life stories of the truly creative writers, painters and musicians, many have exhibited strong indications of manic-depression or more recently referred to as Bipolar disorder. It piqued my curiousity to find out that there is a rather extensive list of many artists throughout history who have suffered from some type of mood disorder.  A partial list contains:  Vincent van Gough, Emily Dickinson, Edgar Allen Poe, Virginia Woolf, Lord Bryon, Mozart and Hemmingway. Just to name a few...These are some of the most recognizable.  The definition of the illness has changed over the decades, but it can be determined that these artists were most likely Bipolar by the exhibited behaviors and symptoms that were recorded.

Thoughts about this topic recently came to me after reading this intriquing book: 

Touched with Fire: Manic -Drepressive Illness and the Artistic Temperament. by Kay Redfield Jamison. It's not a new idea, there has been a correlation between artistic temperment and mani-depressive states for as long as the two have existed.  Yet, this book takes the time and research to actually establish the correlation.  It presents in-depth reasearch on the lives of several famous writers and authors.  Granted, some of the book is dry and "technical" but she does a wonderful job of supporting her thesis and backing it up with facts and figures, not just suppositions.

One quote from the book, that highlights the link bewtween art and "mental distress", also points to the dilemmna of a hesitancy to pursue treatment for fear of quelching the flames of creativity. Jamison states: "Many artists and writers believe that turmoil, sufferring and extremes in emotional experience are integral not only to the human condition but to their abilities as artists.  They fear that psychiatric treatment will transform them into normal, well adjusted, dampened, and bloodless souls--unable, or unmotivated to write, paint or compose.  These fears have greatly intensified as a result of the availability of a wide range of highly effective mood-stabilizing medications."

Edvard Munch- The Scream, 1893

I know all too well about that fear of loss of creativity and the feeling of "flat" emotions from the use of "mood stabilizing" medications. I went thru a whole bevy of meds when initially diagnosed with Bipolar disorder over 20 years ago. I remember that "flat" feeling and just going through the motions of my day. I was so glad to be connecting with reality, but I just didn't feel like myself.

So when I started Lithium to help my symptoms, it became evident to me that this particular drug could help me without feeling like a "bloodless soul".  Lithium is the most commonly prescribed medication for Bipolar and generally the most effective. Nevertheless, for some people it becomes a tradeoff and a difficult choice to make: sometimes the creative process is enhanced by manic episodes. Prescription remedies seem to botch (in the patient's opinion) their "humaness" and creativity. Yet, the alternative of experiencing continued manic episodes and low depressive episodes takes it's toll on the human body. 

Bipolar illness not only worsens over time, it becomes less responsive to medication over time.  Episodes and hospitalizations can increase and sadly, when left untreated, can result in suicide.

While  I don't put myself in the same category as some of these great writers who have suffered for their art, I find some comfort in the fact that as a patient diagnosed with Bipolar disorder, perhaps there is something inside me that is actually creative, not just "crazy".  I don't have the enormous talent of Virginia Wolf, Hemmingway or Poe, yet I have indeed suffered for my art. Not just my art, but also the desire to have a so-called "normal" and happy life.

Once I finally accepted my diagnosis of Bipolar and  determined the proper medication, then things were smoother sailing. Studies have shown that people on lithuim experience few side effects of any kind and less than one third report any significant negative changes in intellectual functioning and reasoning. The creativity was still there, but when going down pathways to find my creative yearnings, I walked down a well lit path, instead of stumbling in the darkness. Perhaps some of my creativity had changed and even stifled, but I was still able to function and not detached from reality.  Hemmingway said it right: "There is nothing to Writing, all you do is sit down at a typewriter and Bleed." So true.  But I would add: just make sure you have the Band-Aids handy.       Julie Etta Smith

 

Mental Illness--Gaining Strength through Acceptance

 Dealing with a diagnosis of mental illness, and learning to accept it, is ironically enough, like dealing with the 5 stages of grief. It is tough to accept the reality of your situation, just as much as it is to accept the reality of your illness. My life became a whole lot easier once I accepted a diagnosis of Bi-Polar and found the proper medication that worked for me. I went through a slew of different meds and 2 different psychiatrists before I finally found a lifestyle and ONE medication that worked for me. As I draw this parallel with the five stages of grief, I think it is best to start out this conversation with a description of those stages.

The Kubler-Ross model, named after the physician who developed it, shows five distinct phases that people experience when dealing with a loss. The five stages of grief are listed as: 

1) Denial

2)Anger

3)Bargaining

4)Depression

5)Acceptance 

 In a grief experience, this generally means the loss of a loved one.  As applied to coping with mental illness, this can also mean dealing with a loss--the loss of a lifestyle and/or your perception of who you are as a person. It was hard for me to accept the fact that perhaps I was not processing things the way most people do and perhaps I needed some chemical assistance to do so.  I remember my psychiatrist telling me once that there is no shame in having to take medication for your brain to work properly.  A diabetic takes insulin, you just need a supplement of lithium for your brain. That explanation helped put things in perspective.

Roy Scheider as Gideon in All That Jazz

My first exposure to the 5 stages of Grief were depicted in the movie All that Jazz by Bob Fosse. Yet, at the time, I did not realize the concept applied to grief. In the movie the same concepts were applied rather to one's own impending death.  That is the way it is portrayed in the movie as the main character, Gideon, grapples with his own life situation.  It's a great movie with an intriguing storyline and phenomenal dance sequences.  Roy Scheider stars in the semi-autobiographical story of a self-destructive director/choreographer.  In the movie the incredibly beautiful "Angel of Death" visits him on a regular basis in his dreams and sometimes his drug induced visions.  All the time he discusses with the angel, and sometimes his reflection in the mirror, the 5 stages of his impending death.  Yes, it is a dark comedy, but one with an interesting message about how some of us cope with what life throws our way.

So when I think about how the stages apply to a diagnosis of mental illness, each and every stage fits perfectly when I think about dealing with my diagnosis of Bi-Polar.  First and foremost, I do think that society's pre-conceived notions of mental illness have definitely changed for the better.  Knowledge is power and the more people understand about different mental illnesses, the more they will be able to be empathetic.  Just like this poster here, we need to stop the Stigma.  

With the stigma of mental illness that is still sometimes perpetuated, that easily leads to the first stage: Denial. Nobody wants to be thought of as "crazy", it must be something else. I remember when I was first diagnosed as Bi-Polar.  Initially it was thought of as Post-Partum Depression and "this too shall pass", but years later I had difficulties again: post-menopausal.  So, it must be hormonal.  Well, that may be true, but I have come to accept that the brain chemicals and the body chemicals do work together (or fight each other). Having the brain and the body in harmony is obviously essential for complete wellness.

The next stage: Anger is a complicated stage that I definitely went through but found it really hard to cope with. My anger was focused on the illness and not the people I love, it made it hard to demonstrate that to my family.  Especially when I was initially dealing with Post-Partum Depression.  It was so frustrating for me to demonstrate that I loved my baby boy and would not hurt him for the world.  In many ways he helped my healing because I wanted to be there to care for him.  Another aspect of Anger that I found so frustrating to deal with is the sexist notion that women shouldn't get angry. Outdating notions of this still exist.  When a man gets angry, he is just being strong and assertive.  But when a woman gets angry, well... she's just being a bitch.  It's hard to fight these stereotypes, some of them are so ingrained in our psyche, but maybe we can try to rise above them.

The third stage: Bargaining to me seems to be bargaining with God. If you are perplexed as to how you got this way in life, then perhaps you would bargain to change this or that.  If only I could give up a certain behavior, then perhaps the rest of my life would be smoother.  Maybe some of my symptoms would disappear? Vowing to yourself to change something might actually help improve your situation.  Yet, finding a medical professional that you trust is probably the most important thing to help you.

The fourth stage: Depression is probably the stage that is the hardest to define. We have all had days when we just had incredible sadness and frustration, but usually those days pass. Yet, sometimes it's more than that.  The Mayo Clinic defines clinical depression in this way:

Depression is a mood disorder that causes a persistent feeling of sadness and loss of interest. Also called major depressive disorder or clinical depression, it affects how you feel, think and behave and can lead to a variety of emotional and physical problems. You may have trouble doing normal day-to-day activities, and sometimes you may feel as if life isn't worth living. More than just a bout of the blues, depression isn't a weakness and you can't simply "snap out" of it. Depression may require long-term treatment. But don't get discouraged. Most people with depression feel better with medication, psychotherapy or both.

So, finding out if you are just feeling blue or clinically depressed is incredibly important.  My diagnosis of Bi-Polar depression had "depression" in the title so for me it was a package deal. Lucky Me. Yet, the hardest thing for me to accept has been that my depression has not necessarily been "situational" depression, but rather a chemical characteristic of my body that I just have to treat and learn to live with. I have dealt with it over the years, but as you can imagine, EVERY medication has side effects, some worse than others.

The fifth and final stage: Acceptance is a tough one to swallow and there are days when you can bounce back up to the #1 stage: Denial.  These stages, as they apply to Grief and also to Mental Health, helps one to understand that you are not alone.  It is important to remember that some people skip stages, while others get stuck in other stages for what can be an unhealthy amount of time.  The process is different for everyone, depending on their circumstances.  

Several factors have helped me with my challenge of learning to stay afloat with a Bi -Polar diagnosis.  First, my Faith has helped me immensely to help me feel loved no matter what.  Second, my family provided support and love in spite of some of my more "difficult" moments.  Last, but certainly not least, I educated myself on my illness, various medications and utilized my strength and power to have a say in my OWN THERAPY and Healing.  Keeping your autonomy, does wonders for your self-esteem and in turn healing.  Of course you need good doctors, friends and family to assist, but remember you are the one that knows what is best for YOU.  It can be a long hard climb, but worth the effort.   

    

                                                      Julie Etta Smith      

 

Hope Springs Eternal

 

White Trillium-a harbinger of spring

As I write these words, it is the very last few days of March and there is a steady snowfall outside my window.  So typical of March to have 70 degrees and sunshine on one day, then snow and wind the next.  Nevertheless, at this juncture it can be frustrating.  Just about everyone I know is so ready for Spring. It is the same back and forth pretty much every year, yet sometimes we never get used to that. We have to have HOPE that Spring will eventually come. I took this photo several years ago on a springtime walk in the woods. The White Trillium is a woodland flower that comes up in April and May.  It is such a delicate, beautiful flower and signifies to me the coming of spring as it bursts forth above the fallen leaves of the previous autumn. Not only is it a pleasure to behold, I found out that in some cultures and philosophies, the 3-petal structure represents balance of the past, present and future and also the connection between mind body and spirit.  Such an impressive connection for something so wonderfully simple.  Sometimes simplicity is the best.

So as we wait, impatiently, for the White Trillium to appear and the moment when we can safely put away the snow shovels away, I am reminded of a mindset that helps me carry forward.  The concept of Hope and how there are certain tools we can use to foster that hope.  One of these tools is one of my favorite Bible verses: Hebrews 11:1 which states:

Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.

The spiritual aspect of this verse has always brought me comfort, but on the more pragmatic level, the green grass, flowers breaching the surface and the warmer temperatures are yet to be seen and felt...but we have faith and hope that those days will arrive.  Of this, I am sure.  Every March I go through this.  I am wanting to visit nurseries and start to plant flowers and plan my vegetable garden.  Yet I have to reign myself in and practice both patience and hope.  

There is also more to utilizing the art of practicing patience and hope than just horticulture and the changes of the seasons.  I get frustrated and borderline depressed when I think of the current "State of Affairs" of our country and all the changes that are taking place under the Trump administration.  I really want, and need, to think positively about the future of this country and the future of the world. 

 So many things these last few months have shocked, angered and dismayed me that I don't know where to turn for solace.  I find solace in HOPE.  I look for ties from the past that at the time seemed monumental but eventually had a way of working out. I do what I can to help make my community and world a better place. Yet, I also have to protect my own mental health and well-being. Yet even the simple concept of hope is such an important tool in making things better: "If there is hope in the future, there is literally power in the present." Zig Ziglar

That being said, I can keep putting one foot in front of the other and keep moving forward based on the premise of HOPE.    Julie Etta Smith

The Original and the Best: Finding my Roots

I have been freelance writing and blogging for 10 years. It is interesting how my writing has evolved, and I hope has improved.  After just finishing my Mom's biography I feel a real sense of accomplishment and it was a labor of love.  I was generally happy with the final result, although writers are their own worst critics.  It was so hard to determine what to put in and what to leave out.  Yet, I like to think that my Mom would have been happy with the book and there are so many wonderful memories and photos to cherish for the people that knew her well.  

So now that it is complete, I pondered what project am I going to work on next? Many different book projects come to mind....but for now I'm going to go back to my blogs.  There is so much satisfaction from telling your stories, viewpoints and life experiences and putting in print. As Maya Angelou once wisely said: "There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you."   Wise woman.  I agree with that need to share various aspects of our human condition with fellow travelers in life.

When I decided to rejuvenate my blogs, I researched the various platforms all over again. So much has changed in 10 years.  My blogging journey has taken me from Blogger to Word Press to Wix.  At the time, the reasons for those changes made sense.  Yet, I thought about where I am today with my writing and what my "needs" are.  I thought about the simplicity of Blogger...the platform for my first blog. Not a huge amount of design options, but the editing was simple and intuitive.  Plus the price was right: FREE.

When I was trying to promote my book, I was concerned about followers, SEO and getting numerous comments on every blog-not any more.  I am more concerned about the simple joy of telling my story.  If others want to read it and share comments with me...great.  However, I am not going to lose sleep over it. All those other concerns seem secondary to many writers who are interested in making money. Yes, actual money from one's writing. What a concept.  Or there is the secondary route of advertising on your blog.  I did try that, but it didn't work for me.  Visually unappealing to go to my blog and see the main text of my blog almost obliterated by ads.  Anyway, not for me.  What it boils down to is that making money is not a priority with my writing.  The above meme says is all.

So in my quest to get back to my roots and following the main purpose of why I love to write, I looked up my original blog: Outlooks & Inspirations on Julieetta1982.blogspot.com 

Low & Behold it was still there and every blog I had written since February of 2015 is archived in it. Thank you, Blogger.  I guess it wouldn't just disappear, unless I deleted it.  But nevertheless, it gave me a feeling of security knowing that my writing has been kept for posterity.  I went in and revised the layout and colors, slightly, just to make it new for me and new for 2025.  Happy 10th Birthday Outlooks & Inspirations.  I plan to keep you going.                                                                                                                                                        Julie Etta Smith

Finding Your Voice

 

When I was a young girl, perhaps in my early teens, my Mom, sister & I made several cross country road trips from Iowa to upstate NY to visit family. I fondly recall one summer when my Mom decided it might be prudent to get a CB radio, for safety reasons if we were on the road and had car trouble. It was the responsible thing to do, yet in the eyes of a teenager girl it was delightful fun to chat with the truckers and just about anybody else I was able to strike up a conversation with up and down the dial. Remember this was before the days of cell phones and before the days of social media. I found it great fun and so did most of the truckers...most of them.  It was all well and good until one of the truckers decided my "handle" should be "ratchet jaw".  In hind sight, it was funny, but at the same time hurtful.  It was one of those moments that you remember years later. It was one of the first times in my life I had been criticized for talking too much.  It also came to be the first of many times. Yet, many of us have traits...parts of our personality that are ingrained in us.  Sometimes it becomes kind of a self fulfilled prophecy.  When someone tells you that you are a certain way...then you start to see yourself that way.  Yes, sometimes I talk a lot, perhaps too much. When those moments arise that I am reprimanded for talking too much, I instinctively back down, for awhile anyway.  Then my need to be heard resurfaces and I feel the need to speak and be heard.

So talking easily with just about anyone is not necessarily a bad thing. I have been told I possess the "Gift of Gab".  It comes in handy for a whole bevy of social situations to help break the ice and sometimes put more people at ease. Yet, learning how to measure your words before you speak is an important skill to have.  It reminds me of the old adage: "Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak and to remove all doubt." This quote is sometimes attributed to Abraham Lincoln, although the actual origin has been debated.  Nevertheless, when I hear it, it sometimes causes me to think twice before making comments.  Especially on a topic I have limited knowledge on.  Tis better to listen and learn in those circumstances.

So frequently I remind myself of another adage: God gave us two ears and one mouth so we should listen twice as much as we talk.  Good point.  Nevertheless when I look at this image of a woman (circa 1950's) being a good girl and reminding either herself  or someone close by to "Shush"...the feminist in me rises and  I want to cry out until my voice is heard. Why is it that silence is sometimes equivalent to complacency?   Not always the case, yet being silent sometimes comes at a cost.

I guess we all need to feel that we are being heard and finding our voice with respect to how we communicate.  Many times it is not merely verbal, but our voice can be carried and displayed in a multitude of ways: music, art and in my case: writing. 

I have compared this blog sometimes to a journal...it feels so good to be able to express myself, to have my voice heard.  Yet someone (I'm not saying who...) said to me: ..."If it's like a journal than why should you care if anybody reads it or not?"  OUCH. Theoretically, maybe I shouldn't care if anybody reads it or not.  But it comes full circle as to why I write...it is a way of finding my voice.  So if no one listens to my "voice" why should I write? Good question. Why does an artist paint? Why does a dancer dance? I write because that is who I am.  Nevertheless, it would be nice to know someone is "listening".  Lately I have grappled with new ideas on how to reach my audience. As a writer and blogger it is sometimes sad to think that when you hit the "Publish" button your work has now gone to cyberspace, possibly never to be viewed except by your own eyes.  Yes, this is a bit dramatic, but sometimes it feels that way. Yet I just continue to write because it is one of the ways I have found my own voice. I have a favorite quote on my bulletin board: Real writers don't write because they can write, they write because they can't NOT write.  Let that sink in.  Therein lies the true nature of the beast.

Here's another food for thought...it's pretty evident to me why social media has become such a pervasive, sometimes even invasive, part of our lives.  People just want to be heard. Like so many ways of communication, there are pros and cons to discussions on social media. In it's early days, Facebook was merely a simple way to keep in touch and share photos, but it has morphed into something much more complicated...in good ways and sometimes NOT so good. Nevertheless, it does still allow dialogue.

So many times I think about communication and how it has changed just in the last few years. Not surprising that this would be a favorite topic of mine because my degree is in Journalism and Mass Communication. Both of those terms: journalism and mass communication encompass entirely different things now from when I graduated college.  It's mind boggling to think how we communicate has changed.  On a personal level, I think it is sad that so many local newspapers have disappeared.  Perhaps technology has replaced them with other ways of connecting with your community, but sometimes I still think there is a void in that respect.  Having connections relevant to your geographic area helps to create a stronger, closely knit community. It brings a sense of identity that only a local paper or local TV station can bring. The town I am currently living in had a local paper that closed down just a few years before I got here. Sad. Maybe I would have enjoyed working with them.  If when I graduated, I had been told you will operate 2 blogs, (what's a blog?)

self-publish 4 books and communicate with your family and friends across the country just by typing a note on your computer (Thanks Facebook).....well at that time I just would not have fathomed it. Not sure what the future will bring as we seek to Find our voice.

So Gentle Readers....I encourage you to Find Your Voice in whatever format is best suited to you.  Find your voice and let you voice be heard.  Julie Etta Smith

Rising to the Challenge: Memorizing Scripture

As a young girl, I remember (not necessarily fondly) having to memorize several piano music pieces for recitals. It was challenging and fun and probably “good for me”, but I just couldn’t see it at that time. Performing in front of my peers and several judges was also pretty nerve racking. Nevertheless, the act of memorizing itself did bring me a feeling of accomplishment.

Flash forward to today and I do enjoy memorizing things, but for different reasons.  I have also found out that working at memorization is physiologically good for your brain.  The older I get, I want to make sure I exercise that part of my body as well.  So for exercising our brains, and the strength of our faith, memorizing Scripture is a great way to achieve both those things. 

Several Christian leaders and influential teachers have shown us the benefits of memorizing scripture. The prolific author Chuck Swindoll writes:

 “I know of no other single practice in the Christian life more rewarding, practically speaking, than memorizing Scripture. . . . No other single exercise pays greater spiritual dividends! Your prayer life will be strengthened. Your witnessing will be sharper and much more effective. Your attitudes and outlook will begin to change. Your mind will become alert and observant. Your confidence and assurance will be enhanced. Your faith will be solidified” (Growing Strong in the Seasons of Life, 61).

The benefits of Memorization are well documented, but additional benefits to memorizing specifically Scripture also provide unique benefits as well.  I found an interesting blog that helps to provide inspiration for memorizing and studying scripture. It is called In The Mirror of God and can be found at: https://inthemirrorofgod.com/  She details many benefits from memorizing scripture including:

·        It builds your Faith

·        It keeps you from Sin

·        It Equips you for Spiritual warfare

·        It keeps your Mind at Peace

·        It Helps you know Biblical Truth & Keeps you from Error

She also provides on this blog several methods to help you memorize scripture and ways to enrich your life as a Christian.

So, since we all know the benefits of scripture memorization, I would encourage all of us to share our favorites with each other.  Perhaps you will find a new one that you would like to rise to the challenge of memorizing. For the record, here are a few of my very favorites that I almost have memorized. I will keep working on them:

Psalm 4:8: In peace I will both lie down and sleep; for you alone, O LORD, make me dwell in safety.  

Philippians 4:6-7: Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. 7 And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Matthew 6:26 :Look at the birds of the air: they do not sow or reap or gather into barns--and yet your heavenly Father feeds them.  Are you not much more valuable than they?  

Psalm 86:7 : In the Day of trouble I will call to you, for you will answer me.

Hebrews 11:1  Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.

Looking forward to hearing about your favorites. You can email me at: Julieetta05@gmail.com or you can respond on this blog. I check my blogs regularly.

 Thanks! Julie